By Sean Pearson
It’s true, you know. Sleeping can be very odd, when you think about it.
Perchance to dream. Aye, there’s the rub.
I’ve been having rather odd dreams lately. I asked my therapist for some sort of interpretation, but she just keeps mumbling something about psychotic features and scribbling furiously in her notebook. (Heck, for all I know, she could be secretly finishing her novel on that legal pad cleverly hidden behind a manila folder. Or maybe she’s doing her doctoral thesis on me and all my neuroses. Great! Now she’ll think I’m narcissistic, too.)
My therapist says I worry too much about what other people think.
I think she’s wrong.
I think I just worry too much about how much there is to think about. Seriously, life is just too overwhelming. Between all the technology, politics, family expectations, jobs, etc., how is anyone really supposed to be able to keep up? My brain wasn’t made to hold all this kind of information.
Here’s how I figure it: I reckon there’s a finite amount of room in my brain for information. Every time I learn something new, I’m pushing something else out. Who knows what kind of valuable information I’m losing everyday? What if one of the things I push out is my shoe size? Or even my blood type?
Hmmmmm. Apparently that’s one I already lost. Sorry blood banks.
And all I can say is, thank heavens for the autonomic nervous system. Can you imagine how stupid I’d look if I forgot how to breathe?
The obvious answer here, is to just not learn anything new at all. Not as easy as you might think. Turns out, there are some things you learn, even without meaning too. That whole, “learn-something-new-everyday” thing has some truth to it.
Heretofore, the idea of unlearning something you have already learned requires more learning, thereby making the whole point moot.
So, this idea we have of dumbing ourselves down via movies like Jackass and Ultimate Fighting Championship matches is really self-defeating.
I thought we were talking about dreams …
So, I’m in this big house — or dorm, or something. I came over for a big party, and now I just want my pants back so I can leave. (No, it wasn’t that kind of party.) There’s just always some weird component of my not having pants and being unable to locate them.
There are many doors in my dream. Some of them lead to different rooms, depending on when you open them. And the “hostess” always seems to be in a big hurry to get me out the door. (Maybe there is some correlation here with the whole “no pants” issue previously stated.)
Anyway, my dreams also seem to involve a lot of driving, and oceans, and lots of rooms. (Did I mention doors?)
I know it’s gotta be some kind of metaphor for something: Symbolism, foreshadowing, irony. What am I missing?
(That was meant as a rhetorical question. While I certainly value your opinion, I really don’t know you from Adam. Did you really expect me to let you analyze my dreams?)
Here’s my rhetorical answer.
I am doomed.
No really, hear me out.
You really can’t “un-know” something. You can know it, and forget it. But you can’t “un-know” it. So, I will either eventually run out of room in my brain completely, and thereby begin the meltdown of the hard drive, or I will continue to try to make more and more room in there for important trivia and just ignore the little intrusive thoughts that poke into my head each day.
Hmmmm. After re-reading this, I can’t tell if I’m going mad, or simply sleep-deprived. Perhaps there’s really no difference.
Wonder what I’ll dream about tonight?
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