Golf is not a sport

by Aaron Selbig

The news last week that the International Olympic Committee selected golf – along with rugby – to be added to the slate of 28 sports at the 2016 Summer Olympics left at least one golfer ecstatic.
“I think it’s great for golf. It would be an honor for anyone who plays this game to become an Olympian,” said Tiger Woods last Friday, adding that he intends to do just that in Rio in 2016.
That’s all great for Tiger and everything – lets face it, he’ll probably win – and I certainly don’t want to be the one to rain on his Olympic parade. But come on, is golf really even a sport?
Now don’t get me wrong – I like golf. I grew up in Arizona where all the local high schools had golf teams. My friends and I used to make extra money fishing golf balls out of the lake at Royal Palms Golf Course and selling them back to golfers in the parking lot. Golf is basically just a fun – if occasionally aggravating – way to get outside and go for a nice long walk.
But I have to disagree with the IOC on this one. Golf if not a sport. Rugby I can see – but not golf.
I’m sure it would be an honor for professional bowlers to be Olympians, too, but we’ll never know because the IOC – wisely – has decided that bowling just isn’t a sport. Same goes for skateboarders, bullfighters and ballroom dancers.
Sorry, losers, you’re not a sport, says the IOC – the same folks who think synchronized swimming, trampolining, rhythmic gymnastics, beach volleyball, speed walking (seriously), dressage (something about walking horses) and modern pentathlon (fencing, pistols, horses, swimming and running) are all sports.
But baseball is not.
Maybe it would be easier for the IOC to avoid controversy if they just applied the Beer Axiom when deciding what is and what isn‘t a sport.
What is the Beer Axiom?
The Beer Axiom, which I just made up, states that if one can drink beer while participating in an activity, then that activity is not a sport.
The Beer Axiom would allow for the inclusion of baseball, football, lacrosse, kickboxing, broomball and possibly softball in the Olympic Games, while ruling out beer-friendly games like bowling, billiards, bass fishing, ping pong, beer pong, shuffleboard, squash, Yahtzee, pinball, lawn darts, regular darts and pole dancing.
And golf. Sorry, Tiger.

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Posted by on Oct 14th, 2009 and filed under Extra Innings. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

4 Responses for “Golf is not a sport”

  1. Kirk Whitehurst says:

    A sport is actually defined as a physical activity that is governed by a set of rules or customs and engaged in competitively. I appreciate Mr. Selbig’s opinion on the introduction of golf into the Olympics, but I think he has missed the mark totally. I think that Pro Golfers make it look fairly easily, but in actuality the Game of golf is more difficult in my opinion than most. To be a true sports athlete and to compete at any level requires dedication, commitment, concentration, practice and love for the game to name just a few. Golf most certainly has these qualities. Sorry Sir, but you’re out line on this one.

  2. not a fan says:

    Golf is a sport. Nascar, however, is not.

  3. Mike Jacki says:

    I will get skaters to put up $100,000 to see your sorry butt drop in on a vert ramp with a Skateboard… you’ll need the cash because it will just about cover your hospital bill… you have no idea… have you ever skated? didn’t think so…
    I bet you’re a fencer! En Guard!

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